A Month or Four

Time has both flown by and crept along. It’s been four months since my diagnosis and one month since my last treatment. It’s been an up and down few months. To be honest, it’s hard to even remember much of it. First, an update, then my learnings.

UPDATE — Suzy and I are both doing well. Things are heading toward the life we used to have, pre-cancer. I’m feeling mostly good. My neck is 95% back to normal. I’m done with pain meds. I’m eating real food, albeit a limited number of things. My blood test results are normal, so I’m past any issues related to white blood cell counts. On the other hand, nothing I eat has much, if any, flavor, so eating just isn’t enjoyable.  I have some lymphedema in my neck (a fancy word for swelling).  Suzy is beginning to be able to relax, getting back into her sewing and other hobbies. Even better, all my challenges are not an hour-to-hour responsibility and burden for her.

LEARNINGS — I’ve been thinking about what I’ve learned through my last few months.

Friends and family

• Even after 30 plus years of marriage, I learned how strong Suzy is, and that she is more special than I ever imagined.
• Eric, Lee, Heidy and Irene are pretty special too, and were there for me every step of the way.
• Team Fleury proved the power of team work.
• Even in the middle of a pandemic and quarantining, friends have been there for Suzy and me.
• Tulsa, St. Louis, Lafayette, Denver, Cincinnati, Minneapolis, California, or even Sydney or Portugal are not that far away when you need comfort and the folks that want to give it.

Attitudes

• Positive thinking does help when you are sick and struggling.
• People are positive and loving.
• I’m stronger than I thought, although I’m not completely comfortable saying it.

Cancer-related

• Cancer is a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad disease.
• When times are tough, taking life a day at a time makes it much more doable.
• When you have a great care team, stop googling and just listen and do what they say!
• Mayo is a special place with special people – that includes doctors, PAs, nurses, radiation therapists, check-in people, schedulers, all the way to the people at the entrance and the lady in finance who gave us a Medicare 101 lesson.
• Waiting for the news on whether the cancer is gone is excruciatingly nerve racking.
• Be nice to folks even when you feel really bad or stressed or whatever. It makes life easier, plus it makes you and them feel better.
• Having cancer during a pandemic made the entire experience and process so much harder psychologically, way more difficult than I imagined.

Miscellaneous

• Help others that are in the same boat as you, or in a different boat but need help.
• Wearing a mask is not that hard. I’ve worn it up 7 hours a day, and it’s not that difficult.
• I need to be a better friend.
• Writing is good medicine.

Thank you, Team Fleury, for following along.  I’ll keep you posted as we wait that eternity between now and the end of March.